


Four Times Someone Found Out About Maria and The Maximoffs.

by Redonkgirl



Series: Fate Will Find A Way. [3]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Fox News, I like to make fun of the media, Other, The Daily Show - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-16
Updated: 2015-06-16
Packaged: 2018-04-04 16:11:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,081
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4144152
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Redonkgirl/pseuds/Redonkgirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Plus One Time Where Everybody Found Out.<br/>Non-Canonical to the series.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Four Times Someone Found Out About Maria and The Maximoffs.

**Rhodey**

.

It had been a hard fight, but they’d done it; they’d stopped Ultron.

But it had come at the cost of one of the Maximoffs’ lives.

Rhodey never met Pietro personally, but he did feel some sadness over the loss of a kid just trying to help.

But, Christ, _everybody else_.

Sure, Clint made sense; he looked like a man full of never-ending guilt.

But, _Natasha_ was wearing the taut expression of someone trying to hold it together until she can be on her own (though, Banner’s desertion might also be contributing).

Thor had gone off somewhere unknown, but had _left Mjolnir_.

Steve was leaning his head on his hand, gazing into the distance with a million mile stare.

Hell, even _Tony_ was showing a surprising amount of emotion for a man that had wanted to kill him.

One thing Rhodey _was_ wondering was where Maria was; he hadn’t seen her since she boarded a lifeboat.

“Hey, where’s Maria?” Rhodey asked Tony, who frowned for a moment before sighing.

“Forgot you didn’t know.”

“Is she okay?”

“Physically, she’s peachy. Possibly the best off out of all of us,” Steve said bitterly from his spot at the table.

“She’s in the med-bay because some genius decided to slam her head into a wall,” Tony said sarcastically.

“It was an instinctual reaction; besides, Wanda said it was for the best,” Steve said.

“What happened?” Rhodey asked “Because whatever it was really messed you guys up.”

“The Maximoffs are Maria’s soulmates. One of them is dead because of us,” Tony said bluntly.

Rhodey froze; as long as he’d known Maria, he’d been helping Tony and Pepper cheer her up whenever someone said something rude about her marks. His favorite encouragement was “If all else fails, one day you’ll have two people who’ll love you more than anything.

As Rhodey thought of young Maria, he almost missed Clint’s reply to Tony.

“Because of me,” Clint said from the back.

“It’s not your fault, Clint,” Natasha said.

“It never is, according to you people,” Clint replied sarcastically.

“Clint, you were just doing your job,” Natasha said.

“Yeah, no one asked speedy to do what he did.”

“But, if I hadn’t-.”

A loud argument erupted between them before they were cut off.

“IT DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER!”

Everyone froze and turned to Steve, who was now standing and staring them all down.

“It doesn’t fucking matter _who_ got him killed, what _does_ matter is that he’s dead, and every single one of us is going to have to see Maria and feel like it was our own fault. So, can we _please_ stop arguing about who did what and figure out how we can make Maria as comfortable as we can as she goes through this?”

It was quiet for a long moment.

“… Make sure that Wanda and Maria are rarely separated,” Natasha offered quietly.

“Handle the press so she doesn’t have to answer painful questions,” Rhodey said “Hell, maybe even move her out of the city for a little bit.”

“I’d offer my place for them to stay, but I don’t know if that’d do her any good,” Clint said cynically.

“Keep her away from alcohol and sharp objects,” Tony muttered, gaining a look from Steve “I wasn’t joking; this might finally set off the Stark gene for self-destruction.”

Before Steve could contribute, Fury entered the room, looking pleased.

“What’re you so happy about?” Clint asked bitterly.

“Something came together the way I wanted it to,” Fury replied, smiling smugly.

“Well, we’re brainstorming about how to make sure Maria _doesn’t_ end up killing herself, so unless you have any bright ideas, why don’t get your self-satisfied ass out of here,” Tony said harshly.

“Alright, alright, I get it; you guys don’t want to hear about how we brought the Maximoff kid back to life.”

“WHAT?”

.

**Pepper**

.

Natasha was walking through a Stark medical facility in upstate New York where they were making _completely_ sure that Pietro was fine before they went back to the Tower.

She smiled slightly as she turned the corner in the facility to find Pepper kicking Tony, who was cringing away.

“It wasn’t my idea!” Tony yelled as Pepper switched to smacking him with her purse.

“That doesn’t matter! You let our teenage daughter be fight in an _extremely_ dangerous _battle_!”

“I was the one who said she shouldn’t come!”

“He’s telling the truth for once,” Natasha said, smirking slightly “He voted no.”

“Who voted yes?”

“Literally everyone else.”

“ _Everyone?”_ Pepper demanded before rounding on Steve, who was walking down the hallway “Captain Rogers, you Okayed Maria going out with the Avengers?”

“Um,” Steve looked slightly guilty “… Yes?”

“ _Why?”_

“She wanted to come and we needed help,” Steve said.

“She’s a _kid_ ,” Pepper said.

“She can make her own decisions,” Natasha said with a strong certainty in her voice.

“Where is she, anyway?” Pepper asked, before looking slightly worried “Is she hurt?”

“No, no, she’s fine. Only a little beaten up, like the rest of us,” Steve promised, exchanging pensive looks with the others.

“Then what is it?”

“I wash my hands of this,” Tony announced, walking away and leaving Steve and Natasha to exchange looks and sigh.

“Come on, Pepper, it’s a long story.”

.

Maria giggled as Pietro played with her hand softly, stopping once there was a knock on the door.

“Come in!” Maria called, Steve sticking his head in.

“Hey, Maria, can I talk to you for a second?”

“Yeah,” Maria said, squeezing Pietro’s hand and kissing him softly before slipping outside.

“We’re going to have to deal with _that_ a lot, aren’t we?” Steve teased, Maria shoving him slightly.

“Yeah, probably. What’s up?”

“Pepper’s here.”

Maria huffed.

“Crap. Exactly how much trouble am I in and how much can I make her forget by bringing up the fact that I found my soulmates?”

“I already told her.”

“Dude!”

“Sorry, but it came up and I didn’t know what to do,” Steve said, not seeming all that sorry “Anyway, she wants to talk to you.”

.

Pepper paced anxiously, waiting for Maria to come explain what the _hell_ was going on.

Finally, Maria rounded the corner and Pepper rushed forward, pulling Maria into a tight hug.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Maria promised.

Pepper pulled back to study her; she was wearing some loose clothes that really didn’t fit her, and had a part of her forehead, near her hairline, covered by some gauze.

“What happened there?” Pepper asked.

“I got hit in the head by a stop sign,” Maria said, shrugging slightly.

“Damn it Maria, why did you think all of this was a good idea?” Pepper demanded “You could’ve gotten killed.”

“But, I didn’t. And I _saved_ people. That’s what’s important,” Maria said, Pepper huffing at the noble truth in her words.

“I was hoping you wouldn’t inherit that from your father.”

“Sorry,” Maria smiled, Pepper smiling begrudgingly in response.

“I’m glad you’re alright… Steve was saying that you…”

“Met my soulmates?” Maria smiled excitedly “Yeah.”

“Congratulations,” Pepper said, pulling Maria into her arms again “What’s their names?”

“Pietro and Wanda Maximoff.”

“Oh, are they married?” Pepper frowned slightly; worried that Maria was having trouble slipping into the relationship.

“No; they’re twins.” Pepper raised an eyebrow.

“Can I meet them?” Pepper asked, Maria biting her lip.

“Sure, just let me talk to them first.”

.

Pietro and Wanda both smiled widely as Maria entered the room, shutting the door behind her.

“Hey,” She said, smiling tenderly at the both of them; Pietro in the hospital bed and Wanda in the hard plastic chair.

“Where were you?” Wanda asked.

“My, uh, stepmother, I guess, wanted to talk to me.”

“And she wants to talk to us,” Wanda said simply, Pietro giving her a sharp look.

“What?” Maria asked, smiling slightly.

“We haven’t been making good impressions on anyone in your family so far,” Pietro pointed out, Maria laughing.

“Well, don’t show her her worst fear and you’ll already be doing better that you did before.”

Wanda gave Maria a dirty look as the younger soulmate went to go grab Pepper.

.

Maria led Pepper into the room, the latter looking interestedly between the two occupying it.

The young man with white hair sat up more as she entered and the dark haired woman stood up, both of them smiling nervously at her.

“Hello. I’m Wanda Maximoff and this is my brother, Pietro.” She spoke with a heavy accent while gesturing towards her brother.

“I don’t think I’m allowed to stand,” Pietro apologized.

“Oh, no it’s fine,” Pepper said, smiling “Are you alright?”

“Yes, I’m fine, they’re just being ridiculous,” Pietro muttered, rolling his eyes.

“Pietro, you got shot eleven times in the chest; you can stay in bed for a couple hours,” Maria said, giving him an indulgent smile even though what she said was sarcastic.

“You got shot _eleven_ times?!” Pepper demanded.

“Idiot,” Wanda muttered, looking at her brother, who gave her an innocent smile.

“How are you okay?” Pepper asked, the twins and Maria exchanging looks.

“Will you accept the power of true love as an answer?” Maria asked hopefully, Pepper giving her a look.

“No, Maria.”

.

“I swear no one tells me anything,” Pepper muttered.

“Well, if it’s any consolation; none of the Avengers knew I _actually_ died either,” Maria offered, Pepper giving her a silencing look.

“Why didn’t you tell any of us?”

“It didn’t seem important. What’s it matter if I died for ten seconds or three days, I’m here _now_.”

“It matters to us,” Wanda muttered, Maria giving her a sympathetic look and grabbing her hand to squeeze it softly before turning back to Pepper.

Pepper had watched the tender exchange with an aching heart; she could _see_ the undeniable proof that Maria loved the Maximoffs.

Pepper had _never_ seen that sort of look in _anyone’s_ eyes, let alone Maria. It was a mix of the look Tony gave her, the way Maria looked at kittens, and a surprising amount of a religious person when they have a vision of angels.

And it broke her heart a little.

Not that Maria had found _two_ people that evoked that expression, but that no one would ever look at Pepper that way.

Pepper didn’t begrudge Tony for it; she knew that this type of love only occurred between soulmates, but _still._

She was looking at them like they were both the most perfect creatures to ever grace the Earth.

“Maria, can I speak to your soulmates alone?’

Maria froze before sending Pietro and Wanda an apologetic look and leaving the hospital room.

“She’s been through a lot.”

“We know,” Wanda said, a sadness clouding both of the Maximoffs’ eyes at the reminder.

“I need to know that you two will look after her; keep her away from danger,” Pepper said, sounding somewhat desperate as the Maximoffs exchanged a look.

“We will do our best to keep her safe, but, she has chosen to be an Avenger; we cannot keep her away from danger,” Pietro said, truthful and determined in what he was saying but worried he was about to piss off his mother-in-law.

It was quiet for a tense second before Pepper leaned back and smiled.

“Good answer.”

The Maximoffs frowned in confusion, making Pepper laugh.

“I needed to know that you two would be truthful and wouldn’t try to control Maria. I would rather she _didn’t_ fight, but, you’re right, she’s chosen to become an Avenger, and we shouldn’t try to force her to change who she is or what she believes in.”

.

**Jade**

.

Jade had been to the Tower a few times, but this was different; she was going to see her friend post fighting a giant battle against robots, who knows what it was going to be like.

She entered the elevator.

“State your name,” A woman’s voice said from the speakers.

“Um, I’m Jade. Jade Moore.”

“Yes, you’re here to see Miss Stark, correct?”

“Yes, uh, correct.”

“I will take you up to the thirtieth floor, Miss Moore.”

Jade was quiet as the elevator smoothly glided up before opening into a living room.

“Thirtieth floor.”

But, Jade was slightly frozen.

Because the door had opened to reveal _the freaking Avengers._

They were sat on couches and were watching some TV show, but they all looked up when she entered.

“Hey, Jade,” Tony said, having met his daughter’s friend.

“Hi, Mr. Stark,” Jade replied, slightly shaky as she stepped out of the elevator.

“Does anyone know where Maria is?” Tony asked the others.

“Last I saw she was trying to get ready,” _Captain freaking America_ said.

“Trying?” Tony asked.

“Pietro and Wanda were attempting to distract her,” Natasha said, smirking slightly before running her eyes over Jade “Maria mentioned you.”

“She did?” Jade asked, her voice slightly squeaky at the prospect of Maria talking about her to _Black Widow;_ a woman that made her reconsider her sexuality.

“You’re her best friend.”

Before Jade respond Maria bolted into the room, looking slightly disheveled, but smiling. Before she could say hi, there was a blur and suddenly there was a man behind her, tickling her far faster than a normal person could, the only way Jade _knew_ he was tickling her was that Maria laughing.

A woman glided in a few seconds after the man, watching the two with an indulgent smile.

“Okay! Okay! You Win!” Maria yelled after a moment.

“Of course I do,” He said smugly, letting up on the tickles, but still holding her close to him.

“Jerk,” Maria said, without any real heat behind it, trying to get out of his hold, but he wasn’t letting her.

“You’re going?” He asked, nodding at Jade, who Maria seemed to notice for the first time.

“Hey, give me a sec, okay?” Maria said, Jade nodding as Maria turned around to face the man holding her, placing her hands on his shoulders “I’ll be gone for two hours or so.”

“I’ll miss you, though,” He replied, pouting slightly.

“It won’t be that long and I’m not going that far,” Maria promised “I’ll be back here in no time.”

He murmured something in a language Jade didn’t know, before leaning down and kissing her. They were obviously holding back since her dad was right there (though, he was ardently _not_ looking at them). Once they pulled away, he gave her one last squeeze and let her slip out of his arms.

But, instead of moving towards her, as Jade thought she would, she moved over to the woman that’d been watching the exchange tenderly, and who now embraced her tightly, kissing her while resting one of her hands on Maria’s cheek. As they kissed, there was a strange red light that appeared around the woman’s hands, which starting flowing through and around Maria.

“Wanda, you’re doing it again,” The man murmured.

The red snapped back and they broke the kiss.

“Sorry,” Wanda muttered, Maria smiling and kissing her cheek softly.

“See you later.”

“Yes, My Love.”

Maria waved at the others, who said their goodbyes, and entered the elevator with Jade.

It was quiet for a moment.

“So, you and-.”

“Not one more word, Moore.”

.

**Barton Family.**

.

It started when Clint returned from Sokovia.

Laura hugged him tight, noticing the guilt in his eyes.

“What happened?”

As the story unfolded, Laura felt her eyes widen in shock when she learned about Maria and the twins and then felt herself feel slightly worried at the guilt her husband felt over what Pietro did for him.

“But, he’s okay, right? Maria saved him.”

“You didn’t see her face when it happened… _I_ caused that.”

“This wasn’t you, Clint.”

“It sure feels like it was,” Clint replied “She isn’t even _mad_ at me about it… It would make me feel better if she at least blamed me, but she doesn’t.”

.

It was Laura’s idea in the end.

When she’d told Clint, he’d frowned for a moment, before smiling, some of the guilt seeming to be alleviated.

.

She knew before they came, she’d have to explain to the kids.

She sat them down, both of them wondering if they’d done something wrong.

“Do you remember seeing pictures of that girl that’s on Daddy’s team?” Laura broached the subject.

“The one named Maria?” Nicole asked, Laura smiling at her daughter.

“Exactly. You might be meeting her soon and I wanted to explain something to you two.”

Laura explained the marks, leaving the more explicit details of bonding out, but making sure her children understood.

“So, they’re supposed to be together?” Lewis asked.

“Yes,” Laura smiled.

“But, some people say they shouldn’t?” Nicole asked, frowning “That’s dumb.”

Laura didn’t even berate her about the mean word.

“Yes it is, Sweetheart.”

.

“Why’re we doing this, again?” Maria asked grumpily even though Pietro’s arm was wrapped around her while Wanda had her hand on her thigh; they had woken her up at five to head down to Clint’s farm since his wife had just given birth.

Honestly the only person that excited was Natasha, seeing how the child was named after her.

“We’re supporting a team member. And to be nice,” Steve said from his spot across from them on the jet.

“I’m not nice,” Maria said, before noticing how suspiciously quiet it got “What?”

“You are, what’s the English word…? Adorable! You are adorable,” Pietro said, smiling down at Maria.

“No I’m not!” Maria protested.

“Maria, My Love, you made us go into a pet shop to look at the kittens a week ago,” Wanda reminded her.

Maria pouted at Wanda, who just shrugged.

“Where was I?” Pietro asked, frowning.

“It was when we were getting Starbucks,” Maria explained “You were asleep.”

“Is that why you two took so long? You were looking at kittens?” Tony asked from the pilot’s seat.

“And puppies,” Maria muttered, Pietro dropping a kiss on her head.

“Anyway, we’re landing soon,” Tony said.

Maria grumbled under her breath, Pietro tightening his arm around her and Wanda starting to draw patterns on her thigh.

.

“So, why did I have to come?” Maria asked, leaning on a fence across from Pietro and Wanda; Clint didn’t want to overwhelm Laura and since those three hadn’t even _met_ her, they’d sent them outside.

“You’re irritable when you’re tired,” Wanda informed her, smiling faux-innocently as Maria glared at her. The staring contest lasted for a few moments before Maria broke it and giggled, and then leaned to kiss Wanda softly.

“Ew!”

Wanda and Maria jumped and looked over to see a young girl grimacing at them.

“Um, Hello,” Maria said, waving at the young girl.

“Why’d you do that? It’s gross!”

“Give it ten years, kiddo,” Maria said “What’s your name?”

“Nicole. You work with my daddy, right?”

“Yep,” Maria said.

“You guys don’t look like a superhero,” She informed them before looking over at Pietro “And you have funny hair.”

The three chuckled.

“Boo!”

Nicole jumped a foot in the air and spinning around to look wide eyed at Pietro, who had just appeared behind her. She was quiet for a second before she giggled.

“How do you do that?”

Pietro grinned and appeared beside Maria.

“I’m a superhero.”

Maria and Wanda both groaned, the former punching him in the arm lightly.

“What can you two do?” Nicole asked the girls, Wanda smirking and letting the red light start to form around her hands before it started to flow towards Pietro.

“No, Wanda, don’t-!”

The energy flowed into his head and he froze, and Maria was slightly worried for a moment before he practically tackled her, covering her in kisses.

“Yuck!” Nicole yelled, covering her eyes.

“Alright, that’s enough Wanda,” Maria giggled before feeling Pietro’s hand start to wander places they really _shouldn’t_ in front of child.

Wanda let up and Pietro pulled away, giving Wanda a dirty look.

“Don’t act like you didn’t want an excuse to do that,” Wanda said, Pietro sticking his tongue out at her “I can see into your head, brother, and it makes me want to blush.”

Maria laughed at Pietro’s embarrassed expression.

“What can you do?” Nicole asked once she noticed that the kissing had stopped.

Maria winked at Nicole and waved for her to follow, walking over to where an old tractor sat a few yards away. Maria grabbed the end and easily lifted it over her head, making Nicole giggled excitedly.

“Put my tractor down, Stark!”

“Hey, your daughter asked,” Maria replied, placing the tractor back down.

“Yeah, when she was supposed to be telling you three to come inside,” Clint said, giving Nicole an admonishing look, who didn’t look sorry in the slightest.

“I wanted to see their superpowers, daddy.”

“Of course you did,” Clint sighed while smiling, before turning to the Maximoffs “You can come inside.”

“Finally,” Maria teased, Clint rolling his eyes, but Maria could _definitely_ tell something was up from his smile.

Especially when they _entered_ the house and everyone was smiling in a very certain way.

Laura smiled at the three newcomers.

“So, you three are Maria, Pietro, and Wanda,” Laura said, smiling at them “I’m not entirely sure why Clint decided to kick you three out.”

“You know _exactly_ why I kicked them out,” Clint said from the other side of the room.

“I know why, I just don’t understand,” Laura replied, rolling her eyes “Alright, Natasha, time to give him up.”

“Hey, it’s fine, she can keep holding him,” Maria said, shrugging.

“Nah,” Natasha smirked, handing the baby to Laura “He should be held by his _other_ namesake.”

“Hm?” Maria asked, frowning.

“Nathaniel _Pietro_ Barton,” Laura said, grinning at the faces the three made; both Wanda and Maria surprised but not confused, while Pietro looked completely and utterly lost.

“Oh, don’t look so shocked, you took, like, eight bullets for me,” Clint pointed out.

“It was eleven; I counted,” Maria replied, Pietro seeming to be awoken from his daze and turning to look at her incredulously.

“You _counted?”_

.

Laura stood in the doorway, looking out onto the field and smiled as she watched Pietro play tag with Nicole and Lewis, which basically meant they’d tried to catch him, and he’d get out of the way just in time.

“Powers are no fair!” Lewis yelled.

“To bad!” Pietro replied, evading Nicole’s attempt to tackle him.

“Daddy! Pietro’s cheating!” Nicole called, Clint laughing as she huffed.

“Tell that to Maria!”

Nicole stomped over to where Maria sat with Wanda on her lap on the porch.

“Can you make him stop?”

Laura laughed as Maria tackled Pietro, letting the kids get him.

“Wanda, they’re ganging up on me!” Pietro whined.

“You’re on your own, brother dear,” Wanda replied, still curled up on the chair Maria just vacated.

“You’re the worst,” He complained, before breaking and smiling up at Maria, who leaned down to give him a peck, making the kids grimace.

“Those three love each other _very_ much,” Laura said, smiling over at her husband.

“It’s pretty gross,” Clint agreed.

.

**The Media/The World.**

.

Maria was adamant that it was _all_ Wanda’s fault.

Well, honestly, it was probably the weird dude with a face that looked like a Greek Tragedy mask and an army of robots fault.

It was anywhere _near_ as sophisticated as Ultron; after they’d hit the kill switch, they all shut off.

But, _before_ Steve managed to get it, Maria may or may not have taken a hit for Wanda.

It really wasn’t that bad, all it did was throw her a few feet away and mess up her nose a bit, which made it look _way_ worse than it actually was.

Once Wanda had taken out the few bots in the vicinity, she ran over to where Maria was hissing as she stood.

“Are you hurt, My Love?!” Wanda asked worriedly, brushing pieces of hair out of her face and cupping her cheeks.

“Nah, I’m fine,” Maria replied.

“You shouldn’t have done that! You could’ve gotten seriously injured!” Wanda said.

“Wanda, I’m _fine_ ,” Maria reassured, squeezing Wanda’s wrists as she was still cupping her cheeks.

Wanda sighed in relief before leaning into give Maria a quick, tender kiss.

But, seemingly not quick enough.

.

**_Maria Stark Cozying Up To Scarlet Witch._ **

**_Soulmates? Who cares!_ **

**_Tony Stark Outraged Over Maria’s Lesbian Fling._ **

.

Steve gave Wanda and Maria a look as he slapped down a tabloid in front of them; a picture of them kissing plastered all over it.

“What do you two have to say for yourselves?”

“… Who’s taking pictures when there’s a battle going on?” Maria demanded.

“People who see Scarlet Witch all over Iron Man’s daughter!” Tony yelled.

“You know, I’m my own person,” Maria said, Wanda squeezing her hand.

Before Tony could respond, Pietro sped into the room, grabbing the magazine.

“Apparently, I am _shocked_ at my sister’s affair,” He said as he flipped through it.

“Ha ha,” Maria said, grabbing the magazine out of his hands and smacking him with it, before he grabbed it back.

“Were you ‘enticed by the brunette’s aloofness’?”

“Hate you.”

“Oh, Wanda, I didn’t realize that you ‘wanted to corrupt America’s sweetheart.’”

“Since when am I an American sweetheart?!”

Pietro suddenly paused, frowning.

“What?” Maria asked.

“They’re saying that they’re shocked that Wanda was able to ‘seduce you away from your soulmates.’”

“That’s what they’re _all_ saying,” Steve said, before looking over “No, no, no! I know that face! That’s the face that started the paintball incident!”

Maria was starting to smile.

.

.

**_Maria Stark: Homewrecker._ **

**_Maria’s and Pietro’s Sordid Love Affair._ **

**_Wanda Maximoff Denounces Twin._ **

.

“You are unbelievable,” Tony said, having come up to the training base for the second time in a week.

“What?” Maria asked innocently.

Tony held up the tabloid with a picture of her and Pietro heatedly making out in an alleyway under the words;

**MARIA’S TEARING THE TEAM APART.**

“Who even took this?”

“Natasha. Plus, we got the money that she was paid for the photo.”

Tony gave a long sigh.

“You are definitely my child.”

Then he smiled slightly.

“Who’d you think is going to figure it out?”

“Oh, Jon, definitely.”

.

The very next night, on the Daily Show, Jon Stewart pointed out that it was pretty strange that she was caught making out with _two people_ within a week of each other. And that it was pretty strange that they even caught her and Pietro kissing seeing how they were in some random alleyway, which was _strange_ in itself.

And, the icing on the cake was a snippet from an interview that Maria did _on the Daily Show_ saying that she _enjoyed_ messing with the media.

“All I’m say is that there are two options, because I _know_ Maria, her very first interview she ever did was on this show, and I like to think I understand how her mind works. Okay, here we go; Option one; she’s pulling an elaborate prank on the news media as a whole and is pretending that she’s tearing the team apart by lip locking with both Maximoff twins, and is just joking around with her new teammates.”

“ _Or_ , and this suggestion is going to be rather controversial, she’s pulling an elaborate prank on the news media as a whole and is pretending that she’s tearing the team apart by lip locking with both Maximoff twins, and she finally met the people the universe intended for her to be with.”

“Either way, _congratulations_ Maria on breaking the world.”

.

 **Maria Stark** @mariastark  
Option two, Jon.

.

That day was known as the _first_ day every single social media website crashed simultaneously because of what was being dubbed “Maxiria.”

.

**_Maria Stark Finds Soulmates._ **

**_Maria Stark and Twin Lovers._ **

**_Maria Stark: Incest or Concubines?_ **

.

 **Maria Stark** @mariastark  
The Maximoffs don’t find me calling them my concubines nearly as funny as I do.

.

The _second_ time the internet crashed because of Maxiria was actually three days later, and was caused by _Steve_.

.

It was team movie night and the group was just finishing up on Titanic.

Steve looked over to where Maria and the twins had been sitting, and smiled; Maria had said that she didn’t even _like_ the Titanic, but had sat through it for the Maximoffs, and seemed to get interested in the movie simply because they did.

Maria and Wanda were sitting pretty normal, with Wanda’s head on Maria’s shoulder as the younger soulmate threaded her fingers through her hair, while Pietro was sitting on Maria’s lap, which was kind of funny looking since he was quite a bit bigger than her. But, she didn’t seem to mind as he curled up against her; his legs thrown over his sister’s lap and his arm behind Maria and across the back of the couch.

The three of them were too interested in Rose promising to never let go that they didn’t notice when Steve took a sneaky picture.

.

 **Steve Rogers** @captainrogers  
Dorks #Maxiria

.

**_Maxiria: The Best Thing Since Brangelina?_ **

**_Maria And The Maximoffs Are Killing Us With Cuteness._ **

**_Maria Stark Aiding the Emasculation Of American Men?_ **

.

“According to Fox News and miscellaneous people, I’m emasculating you,” Maria informed Pietro, both of the Maximoffs rolling their eyes; the team had quickly explained Fox News to the twins, and showed them some damning evidence.

(Well, Maria had shown them some Daily Show clip while _everyone else_ showed them the clips of Fox News calling Maria a whore.

Wanda and Pietro had offered to protect their lover’s reputation, but Maria had to convince them that it was better to take the high road and that she didn’t _ever_ have _that_ great of a reputation.)

Pietro smiled at his soulmate, before plopping down on her lap and kissing her. Maria gave a soft sound as Pietro ran his fingers through her hair and biting her lip softly, and she pulled him closer. Pietro let his hand slip under her shirt, making her groan softly and retaliate by pulling his hair.

“Oh For God’s Sake!”

Maria and Pietro pulled away, both of them blearily looking over at Sam.

“This is the kitchen! What’re you two doing?!”

“Pissing off dumb people who’re mad that we’re not adhering to their toxic masculine beliefs.”

It was quiet for a long moment before Sam gave a long sigh.

“Carry on.”

They shrugged and went back to making out with Wanda smiling at them, once again, not noticing when someone was taking a picture of them.

.

**_Maria Stark’s Voyeuristic Concubines._ **

.

“Must we always be the concubines?”

“Yes.”


End file.
